Princess Sparkles

Princess Sparkles – The Life Of A Unicorn
(Note: this is what lack of sleep and utter boredom can produce)

Once upon a time there was a unicorn, she was pink and had a big fluffy mane. The Unicorn also had the largest horn of any unicorn, which was made of solid gold and was a magical horn. She accidentally poked out her turtle friend’s eye with her horn once. Which is why it is now gold, because turtle eyes bleed gold (or so I’ve been told). After the eye stopped bleeding the unicorn picked it up and popped it back into the turtles head. Because the unicorn’s horn was magical she healed her turtle friend’s eye and it was better than it was before the unicorn (named Princess Sparkles) poked it out. One day Princess Sparkles met this rock (named Rocky) and she decided that Rocky would be her new best friend. The rock was rough, fat and had BO. Not even an entire warehouse of deodorant could stop it.
You know when you’re on a bus and next to you sits a big dude who smells as though he hasn’t ever showered? Well Rocky’s BO was a cross between that and a super duper rotten egg fart but far worse. Whenever Princess Sparkles went near Rocky she had to put earplugs up her nose. After a while Princes Sparkles couldn’t stand the smell of rocky any more, so she rolled him (with great difficulty as he was so fat) into (his greatest fear) the river! But Princess Sparkles fell into the water when she was pushing Rocky in, so Princess used her magical powers and teleported herself to McDonalds. While at McDonalds she ate 26 big Macs and this led to the deterioration of her health. She got diarrhoea which led to bad gas, then it reminded her of her friend Rocky, she felt sad ate more food for comfort which started an endless paradox.
Two years later Princess Sparkles was obesely over weight so she went on the biggest loser. Her time at the biggest loser was difficult but she got through it… just. After losing all her excess weight Princess Sparkles wanted to do something meaningful with her life, so she joined the King’s army. But she decided that being in the King’s army wasn’t good enough for her and she wanted to go all the way and become queen. Sparkles had always been a drama queen, which would put her one step closer to the throne. She needed to marry a prince, at the time there was rumours of a new prince unicorn called Pebble, conveniently Sparkles knew where he was going and wanted to meet this unicorn prince.
She waited and waited until finally he arrived, she introduced herself and so did he, as they exchanged stories Sparkles had a weird suspicion that he was Rocky. But that was crazy Rocky had been dead for nearly three years plus this prince smelt of chocolate and rain. Princess Sparkles suspicion was correct, it was Rocky, for the moment he had hit the water he magically turned the complete opposite of what he was, into Prince Pebble, although he wasn’t planing on telling Princess Sparkles any time soon. But Princess Sparkles was smarter than he thought and figured out who he really was, then told him she had always loved him and didn’t mean to drown him- she had only meant to go to the river for a romantic picnic lunch. Prince Pebble still hadn’t forgiven her and was still angry with her for trying to drown him. So he went off for another three years.
It was dark but the moonlight breached the trees canopies and made a small circle of light in which a lonely unicorn sat. At last after tracking him for a week the hunter had caught up then suddenly a whinny sounded behind him, before he knew it there was a hoof buried in his skull, he fell to the ground limp. Upon hearing the whinny Prince Pebble and was trying to comprehend what was happening. There she stood the moon light lighting her up life some kind of angel, Princess Sparkles she had tears in her eyes as she looked at him “R…R…Rocky” she stuttered. “Is that you?” Princess Sparkles waited for an answer and with a quiet “yes” he galloped off before the hunter could wake up. Princess Sparkles (who had forgotten about the hunter) sat down and began to cry, the hunter stood and crept up behind her… Feeling bad for leaving Princess Sparkles, Prince Pebble returned to her, sneaking up behind the hunter he stabbed him through the heart with his horn, killing him dead. Princess Sparkles was delighted to see the prince again and said, “thank you, very much” and he answered “your welcome.”
It was a beautiful day sunny but not hot, all the flowers were in blossom and there on a riverbank under a lone willow stood Pebble and Sparkles with a shinning white stallion between them. The stallion said “I pronounce you mare and stallion now joined into one by your love for each other.” They touched noses and the entire crowd whinnied. Two years on they had a foal they named him Sparkly Pebble and they all grew old together.

written by:
Catherine Hooper
Kim Gates
Emily Coxhead
Christopher Coxhead
Joshua Coxhead
Bradley Rose
(october 2008)